CristaAnne.com breaks into the Top Ten Sex Blogging Superheroes of 2015!!

So proud of my little blog that could…

#MedicatedandMighty selfie

#MedicatedandMighty 

When introducing myself in panels, workshops or in interviews I’ll often call myself “a professional oversharer who has blogged since long before the term “blog” even existed.” Starting with angelfire sites in the late 90’s and then LiveJournal, blogger and other platforms – writing online has been a natural comfort zone for my ambiverted self. As I moved through my journey of self discovery I tried out many urls and personas, looking for the perfect fit. Eventually it was obvious that I was most comfortable as myself, so I picked up this domain with the intention of it being a small personal blog and writing outlet.

About a year ago I began writing more about my battles with depression and PTSD which quickly turned into #OrgasmQuest. My little blog that could had worldwide media attention, my life changed permanently. When The Madness hit our life (the custody battle that consumed most of this year) I had to back off posting here for many reasons. For months this site was almost exclusively instagram posts and very sporadic brief updates while we made our way through our worst fears come to life.

While I was unable to speak about my life in a public way, you amazing folks stuck with me. Love and support flowed our way through and after the worst of the worst – I am forever grateful. Right as I began to return to the world, Kinkly launched their Top 100 Sex Blogging Superheroes of 2015 contest. Shamelessly I courted votes without a ton of expectations, my life and thus my writing had not been very sexy. My goal was top fifty, my hope was top twenty-five.

When the results were released a few days ago, I almost dropped my pad.

The Top 100 Sex Blogging Superheroes of 2015:

  1. The Black Pomegranate
  2. The Redhead Bedhead
  3. A Sexy Woman of a Certain Age
  4. Oh Joy, Sex Toy
  5. Girly Juice
  6. Crista Anne (!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
  7. Hey Epiphora
  8. Girl Boner
  9. Slutty Girl Problems
  10. The Ins and Outs

The rest of the Top 100

Crista Anne bills herself as a “rainbow-colored pleasure revolutionary.” We love that slogan as much as her bold writing on sex, depression and everything in between.

Credit where credit is due, my moniker of “Rainbow-colored Pleasure Revolutionary” was bequeathed to me by Carol Queen in the Good Vibes #OrgasmQuest interview. It’s perfect. When my writing is praised as being bold and unique – my goals have been achieved.

It’s taken me a few days to find words of gratitude. 2015 has been the hardest, most painfully soul wrenching year of my life. The darkness that covered so much of this year got the best of me more often than I care to admit. While I count down the days to the end of ’15 so I can put this horrific year behind me, this recognition means a great deal.

Thank you.

@GoodVibesToys Is Helping Spread Sex-Positivity To Festival

I love @GoodVibesToys So Very Much. This year they are sponsoring my endless quest to spread Sex Positivity while on our Vacation.

Every year Val and I take a two-week vacation to Brushwood Folklore Center in NY for their two festivals. Brushwood is our home away from home, time where we completely unplug from the outside world and spend quality time with some of our dearest loves who are flung across the country. Last year we started volunteering, both working the gate. With my rainbow wardrobe, I have been christened within the community “Rainbow Brite of the Gate”.

Of course, I’m also known for my train case of sex toys & constant desire to have conversations around Sex Positivity. This community is a beautiful collection of hippies, pagans and free thinkers. These folks are, overall, not very tech savvy or on the web much – so these are people who are already on a sex positive path, but haven’t encountered the larger sex positive community.

This year Good Vibrations has been wonderful enough to send me a large box full of Sliquid Organics and Please Cream in Water & Silicone samples, Glyde condoms in Ultra & Wild Berry &….

  The coveted Rechargeable Magic Wand!

At Catalyst Con East I attended a panel by Carol Queen on What Sex Positivity Is and Isn’t. At the end she implored us to spread the truly positive, inclusive brand of Sex Positivity as much as we could. So I am taking this wonderful opportunity to do so while on our glorious vacation. For when Carol Queen makes a request, you know I’ll find a way to fulfill it.

To my beloved Brushwoodians who may be reading this, Rainbow Brite of the Gate will have all these glorious goodies at Elysium. Please feel free to drop by our camp to chat & check out the glory.

I am a Mighty Happy Crista.

Rainbow Brite of the Gate

Rainbow Brite of the Gate

Life Goal Completed – I Am a SheVibe Superhero

#OrgasmQuest has gone so far beyond my wildest dreams. Interviewed by Carol Queen. Front page of a number of my favorite sites and blogs. New wonderful friends. Now. Now I’m a Motherfucking SheVibe Superhero and I can cross another item off my list of Life Goals. BEHOLD! Continue reading

Writing for Myself: This is Who I Am.

This site, blog, my tweets, this is all me. This is who I am.

Hello, I'm Crista

Hello, I’m Crista

This is not a persona, this is not a brand. My name IS Crista Anne. As many people can attest, I am the same online and off. The first word people usually use to describe me is sweet. I appreciate that about myself, my sweetness, my kindness, my empathy. I’ve worked hard to retain them though my life.

We live in this age of snark, hostility, harassment. As has been said here before, I reject all that. Yes, I do occasionally use snark in the face of harassment, hostility or threats – but snark in those cases is what I see as my best option. Snark has a place in this world, I deeply dislike that it’s become the first response instead of empathy. People keep telling me to get over it, this is how the world is.

Nothing changes unless people change. One by one. At least in this instance.

When you’re interacting with me online, you’re interacting with the real me. I call myself a “Professional Oversharer” not because of the attention seeking, but because I’m comfortable talking about a wide range of the messiness of life that others like to gloss over. Ignore. Shame. I share my imperfections, flaws, and mistakes along with everything else because I’m comfortable with all of it.

I honestly love myself. Which has taken a very long time to do, but here I am. I love myself, even the ugly bits. The parts that are still broken, for I am a work in progress.

I love my life, as hard and as messy and as complicated as it is. I love my Partner-In-Everything, XVO. I love his strength and brilliance. His goodness, acceptance and support. I love our us. I love how we face life together, even when it’s hard, even when we have differences.

I love my work. The work I am doing now, that I have done in the past, the work I will do in the future. I’ll take and run with Carol Queen calling me a rainbow-colored pleasure revolutionary!” It’s what I am, it’s what I will continue to be.

This site was intended to be my little space within the vastness of the internet. #OrgasmQuest took over for a while, but this is still my space for me. You may not like everything I have to say, you may not agree with everything I do. If you choose to voice those disagreements, as long as it is done respectfully, I’m happy to engage. As stated in my earlier post, I cannot begin to keep up with the emails regarding #OrgasmQuest, but comments here? Interacting with me on twitter? If I’m around, I’m happy to chat. I really do like most people, I do tend to give the benefit of doubt to folks. I hope they do the same in return with me.

Thoughts on today’s adventure regarding Buzzfeed, #OrgasmQuest, & xoJane

I’m off the trending list on Buzzfeed, so I now can relax.

Introverted Crista is Introverted

I wave hello to you all.

Remember when I said that I was swearing off media for the week because I was burned out and needed to focus on parenting? Apparently my pants are on fire. When my buddy Andy at Good Vibes mentioned the possibility of doing an interview with Carol Fucking Queen, that went right out the fucking window, because Carol Queen. No disrespect to any of the amazing journalists that I have talked to or will in the future, but nothing can top being interviewed by your foremost idol. If you haven’t read that interview yet, please do, because it’s a physical realization of my Ultimate Dream come true.

Around this time I was contacted by  from Buzzfeed UK. She said she’d been following #OrgasmQuest, related to my story and wanted to cover it. We bounced emails back and forth, I felt really comfortable with her, and the no interviews this week rule flew out the window. When I do read buzzfeed, I tend to look over there because I find their stories less sensational and snarky. The interview was fantastic, Maggy is an excellent interviewer, and the final piece is something that I really enjoy. If it wasn’t about me, I’d have been sharing it everywhere.

I woke up this morning with the article already approaching 100k views, top of the trending list, and with more new twitter followers than I knew what to do with. You don’t even want to know what my email and IM’s looked like. At the same time I had to prepare a small child for a trip to the dentist, so it’s safe to say that chaos reigned.

Once I was able to engage with social media, I had the amazing experience of positive interactions with most of my heroes, idols, and revolutionaries. Going through my twitter mentions, it now seems that almost every really fucking awesome person there is now follows me. (Yes, I know, I only have 2200ish followers. My criteria for really fucking awesome is quite high.) Most of today was really, really fun.

Then it hit me that out of everyone I idolize, the only two people that I haven’t had a conversation with that involved mutual respect are Rachel Maddow and Ani Difranco. Heck, maybe I’ll change that tomorrow. Who knows!

I have not looked at the comments section on buzzfeed nor the FB page. I choose to only engage with the people who found me on twitter. Maybe I’ll do that later, Val tells me that it’s mostly positive with flashes of absurdity. I do need to go back to the comment section of my xoJane article, because it’s part of the agreement I signed as a freelancer. Hopefully that isn’t horrible.

Regarding xoJane, I’ve been in contact with their head of social media. Again – everyone within the xoJane staff has been a pleasure to collaborate with. It’s their comment section that are just horrific. I’ve expressed this to them so I’ll repeat it here. Warning their writers about how vitriolic or at best snarky the commenting community is before they publish would go a long way. When I wrote a Sex Diary for NYMag, one of the first things I was told was that people loved to rip the diaries to shreds. With that knowledge going in? I prepared myself for the worst, turned out to be fine.

I’m not “whining” about people being mean to me. Nor am I going to produce the threats to “prove” they existed. I’m not playing that game. Why? Cause there is no winning. So either believe me or not. Really don’t have any fucks to give there. I do loathe our internet culture of snark first, be reasonable later. That’s not an xoJane problem, it’s pervasive. It’s also far more intense when you are a femme presenting person. Still, not gonna shut me up. I’ve been writing for as long as some of these people have possibly been alive.

A lot of comments across all articles have been “oh look, a new person trying to be internet famous for nothing”. Nothing I say will change those people’s minds, but I can tell you that I do feel relief at not being trending anymore. I’m an introvert. Sure, I like attention, but I also like down time. Now that I’m not trending, I feel like there is down time. If you look at my archives for this site, you’ll notice a six month gap in posting. That is because pre-#OrgasmQuest, this site was entirely me writing for me.

This site is going to stay me writing for me.

I’ve invited a few other people to write as well, XVO/Val – My partner has posted and will post more in the future. He is my Partner-in-Everything, so I want his voice to be expressed here as well. Some people have asked to share their #OrgasmQuest stories, I’m thrilled to add them. #OrgasmQuest isn’t going to end when the media attention ends, it will continue for as long as it needs to. It may evolve. I’m open to whatever comes next.

So, now I am off to respond to comments at xoJane and then? Then I reward myself. Remember that big box of love from Tantus? Life has been so intense that I haven’t opened it fully yet. So that’s my reward after this long day, I’m going to gleefully discover what is inside and then spam twitter with my glee.

That’s my self care, and it will be delightful.

Crista Anne on #OrgasmQuest–the Carol Queen Interview!

My longtime readers are well aware of this, but for all you wonderful new people, Carol Queen is my idol. Since I discovered her work over a decade ago, my ultimate dream has been to do and put out work that earned her respect. I do mean ultimate dream, it’s what I would have wished for first if I found a magic lamp.

That dream has come true: Carol Queen calls me a “rainbow-colored pleasure revolutionary!”

Everyone who does any sort of sex education or sex therapy has probably heard from people who have issues with orgasm and/or arousal once they go on antidepressants. It’s a terrible conundrum: Sexual dysfunction can itself be an effect of––even diagnostic for––depression, but the treatment for that depression alters brain chemistry and often results in sexual problems too. Blogger Crista Anne is fighting back! With her project #OrgasmQuest she’s shedding light both on depression and sexual response, and her wise words are being heard in perhaps-suprising places: She was interviewed last week by Dr. Drew, got some love from Cosmo, and of course the usual sex-positive and feminist and lady-culture suspects have talked to her too. Now it’s my turn!

Read the Rest at Good Vibes blog

I have so much more to say on this entire experience, but my Mommy Duty calls! While I’m being super Mama, check out my wonderful #OrgasmQuest sponsor, Good Vibes. They are dear to my heart and have had a vital role in my development from Wee Outlaw Dildo Peddler to Rainbow Hued Badass.